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Thursday, January 27, 2005

 

Restrained mirth

Town this week seems to becoming infested with a peculiar subhuman sect known as CHAV. WTF possesses anyone to want to be one? Come on for crying out loud. Are they so desperate for peer group approval to choose a peer group which no other bugger in their right mind is desperate enough to aspire to?
Holy smoke! (Said the vicar as his cassock caught fire) Roll on Armageddon. Humans as a species do not deserve to survive if this is the best we can do.

Maybe this is what causes mass extinctions. At a certain point in a species development it begins to suffer from an evolutionary implosion. Although no one has found the fossil remains of a Tyrannosaur with a Burberry baseball cap on yet (However, if you are a paleontologist and know different - I'd love to know.). Could Trilobites in their millions have died of embarrassment because too many of their young were degenerating into this subspecies? Is this what happened to the early giant marsupials? Never mind meteorites and massive volcanic eruptions, it must be a pretty tough thing for any parent to find one of these creatures slumped on the sofa hogging the TV with it's Playstation on full volume. No wonder the suicide rate is up. Perhaps eugenics should be seriously considered.

One of our lads booked a beat up looking 1990 Ford Fiesta on double yellows today. CCTV reported he'd just left the street when a group of these immature baseball cap tracksuit wearing cretins appeared from their hiding place and were holding a discussion group over the Penalty Charge Notice. It looked like they were having trouble understanding it because it wasn't in text language.

Made a comment on Dave Copperfields (Coppers blog) blog about Chavs not being computer literate enough to build their own web prescence only to be directed to an entire Internet world of Chav. Chavscum, Chavworld and Chavtowns being three of the most 'popular'. Most of these are hate sites, where Chavs are quite rightly ridiculed, reviled and castigated. See what you think.

We as Traffic Wardens have been told that under no circumstances should we challenge aggressive and obnoxious Chavs as they might run home crying to mummy. Despite that, I still think the idea of the 'weaponised' CCTV system might be a good idea. I think I've just found a new use for it.

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Exasperated expatriate expostulations all the way from British Columbia, Canada. As if anyone really cared. Oh, I also watch Icelandic Volcanoes and seismic activity. Don't ask me why.

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