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Tuesday, January 30, 2007


Dead boots

Have just ‘retired’ my last set of boots after 10 months (See photo) and have been doing a bit of simple arithmetic which produced the following slightly scary results;

Based on an average day I reckon my average speed is something like 2 and a half miles an hour. Max speed is around 4 mph (When I’m in a hurry) and lowest average speed something like one and a half miles an hour, so as a rough guesstimate two and a half miles an hour is a reasonable compromise figure. Using this as my baseline I actually patrol (Walking time) something like 7 hours a day (Breaks are not included in this 7 hour figure); ergo 7 x 2.5 = 17.5 Miles a day wearing ‘safety’ boots. This does not include a total of thirty minutes walking to and from work every day or any 'off duty' walking during breaks.

Now; I’m actually on duty excluding holidays and rest days something like 248 days a year. 17.5 x 248 = 4340 miles a year (Ye cats! That’s more than some people drive!). Each boot weighs in at a shade under a kilo (Just over 2lbs) each. This I can verify (I weighed them when they were first issued). No wonder my feet ‘burn’ and my knees get a little creaky after a long working day.

We have to wear these heavy boots because ‘elf ‘n safety’ policy dictates we must, yet none of us have had anyone run over their feet, nor, I think ever will. To cap it all, no-one has ever adequately explained why heavy footwear like this is necessary. Nevertheless, we are told we have to wear them. Half the guys lose sick time to foot and lower pedal extremity afflictions every year, despite every insole known to man and pharmacist. Personally, I’d like to get hold of whoever did the risk assessment and make them do half our mileage in this footwear on a treadmill every day for four hours. Pain can be a great teacher; at least according to some people with sadomasochistic tendencies. For myself, I could do without it.

No wonder I feel knackered after every working ‘week’. My boots tell their own story more eloquently than I ever could.


Anonymous DJ said...

Suggest you invest in a pair of Alt-Berg boots, as used by UK Military and Police Officers... Much better than the majority of standard issue safety boots. I spend about as much time on my feet, and wouldn't be without them!

see - recommendation is the Peacekeeper range...

Wednesday, January 31, 2007 12:00:00 am  
Blogger Bill Sticker said...


The altberg boots look good, but the prices are out of my meagre budgets reach. No matter what you've heard, we don't get paid that much. Besides, my employers won't stump up for that kind of cash, 50 quid is top bat for them. Guess I'll have to wait for the sales.



Wednesday, January 31, 2007 6:27:00 am  
Anonymous James said...

Rumour has it that you can get Alt-Berg boots for about twenty quid on the web; I seem to remember Inspector Gadget or one of the other police bloggers saying something about it.
And at least you're not made to wear a stab-vest like the wardens in Brighton or somewhere.

Wednesday, January 31, 2007 8:47:00 am  
Blogger Aginoth said...

On the bright side if you're all walking 4000 miles plus each year that would explain why you never see an overweight Parking Attendant

Wednesday, January 31, 2007 9:40:00 am  
Anonymous Ian said...

I would recommend a pair of walking boots (not mountain boots). They will SHOULD be in the price bracket you are looking for and they will be better for your feet.

Wednesday, January 31, 2007 12:31:00 pm  
Anonymous Graham said...

Maybe check out some of the air-side/non-metallic safety boots? I've not picked a pair up but I'll have some on Wednesday and will compare the weight with my normal (standard steel toe) and report back! They're a touch under £40 from Screwfix, maybe less if you have a suitable shop on your patch!

Thursday, February 01, 2007 4:39:00 pm  
Anonymous h said...


Whensoever my shoes look like this they are certified biological weapons.

Thursday, February 01, 2007 7:09:00 pm  
Blogger Quartz said...

I suppose it's not much good recommending a pair of £360 custom-fit hand made boots? Absolutely gob-smackingly awesome.

Thursday, February 01, 2007 10:49:00 pm  
Blogger Enigma said...

Tell me what is good about controlled parking zones. We have parking anarchy in Cardiff and the local paper fighting against controlled parking zones.

Sunday, February 04, 2007 11:47:00 am  
Blogger Oblique Viewer said...

I recall from my distant past that for every 1lb (or kilo or whatever unit of weight you care to use) on your feet, it's equivalent to carrying 5lbs on your back in a rucksack. hence the ankle weights used by some atheletes to increase stamina etc.

Sunday, February 04, 2007 2:28:00 pm  
Blogger Bill Sticker said...


A Controlled Parking Zone is a decriminalisation order operating within a Special Parking Area (Which can be as big as a city or even a county). This means that parking enforcement falls under the remit of the Local Authority. Rather like the people I work for, rather than the old fashioned Police Controlled Traffic Wardens.

There are more of us, and the rest of my story is in this blog.



Sunday, February 04, 2007 9:19:00 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Re: the running over of the feet, as a keen motorcyclist I am still questing for the ultimate knowledge: are steel toe caps counter-productive beyond a certain amount of pressure being applied? I.e. plastic toe caps stand so much then crush, resulting in squashed toes whereas steel toe caps withstand more pressure but then are forced down through the sole severing some toes? Discuss... please.

Wednesday, February 07, 2007 12:08:00 pm  
Anonymous DJ said...

Re my previous post, the Alt-Bergs are available with a suitable discount to Public Service workers... I'm sure you just about fit into this category! And after the discount, they should be within your budget! Worth giving them a call...

Wednesday, February 07, 2007 11:26:00 pm  

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Exasperated expatriate expostulations all the way from British Columbia, Canada. As if anyone really cared. Oh, I also watch Icelandic Volcanoes and seismic activity. Don't ask me why.

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