Life and the meaning of sex
It’s been a quiet day. I think all the weather warnings have been keeping the parking pests at home today. This gave me a little time to look up from the grindstone and have a look at my surroundings for the first time in a few days. I’m right in the middle of an open air car park, well clear of any buildings and my eyes happen to catch something fluttering in the bare winter branches of an ornamental Municipal Cherry tree. One gauzy green thong, as worn by girls who wish to be liberated from their state of celibacy. Size 10 if I’m any judge.
“Someone must be feeling a draught.” Was my first thought.
Second thought was; “Why throw it up in a tree?”
Third thought was; “Were they in celebratory mood? Perhaps someone enjoyed losing their virginity.”
Which led me on to this train of thought; why do we say that we ‘lose’ our virginity? How do you lose something which is not a physical item to be mislaid? That is the definition of ‘To lose’, surely? If you lose something, you can no longer find it, it does not mean that the item lost no longer exists, it means that the item which is ‘lost’ can no longer be located.
When you ‘lose’ your virginity it just ceases to exist as a part of the human condition. The first act of coition or sex, at which people say that they have 'lost' their virginity, generally means that in the case of the human female, the hymen, a membrane surrounding the vaginal opening, is torn or enlarged by the act of sexual penetration. Whilst the hymen is indicative of virginity, this is not always so. For further explanation, look it up yourself. As for us males, the first act of sex generally means you now know what it feels like and would like to do it again as soon as possible, please. In neither case is anything ‘lost’. If anything, you have gained a kind of kinaesthetic knowledge. Any loss is purely that of a metaphysical state of prior being. Almost a paradigm shift of thinking occurs, usually headed by the thought ‘So that was what all the fuss is about’. Nothing physical really drops off (Unless your Mum has told you all kinds of horror stories.). It definitely does not mean that your ‘virginity’ is left lying around in the street for any Tom, Dick or Harriet to pick up and recycle. Virginities do not get dumped in a landfill or transported to a gigantic ‘Lost Virginity’ warehouses where rack upon rack of discarded virginities are stored, awaiting claim by their erstwhile owners.
Taking all the above on board, I feel that ‘lose’ is the wrong term to use. If you lose something you tend to want it back, and very few people of my acquaintance have ever voiced such a desire about their virginity. It’s just one of those things. You can’t ‘lose’ your childhood, your mind, or your virginity. You might have had a crappy childhood and your first sex might have been pretty naff and unsatisfying; your ‘mind’ is in your head and the only way to lose that is to get killed. To ‘lose’ any of those seems no more than a literary conceit.
I’m confused. Is that weird enough for everyone?
“Someone must be feeling a draught.” Was my first thought.
Second thought was; “Why throw it up in a tree?”
Third thought was; “Were they in celebratory mood? Perhaps someone enjoyed losing their virginity.”
Which led me on to this train of thought; why do we say that we ‘lose’ our virginity? How do you lose something which is not a physical item to be mislaid? That is the definition of ‘To lose’, surely? If you lose something, you can no longer find it, it does not mean that the item lost no longer exists, it means that the item which is ‘lost’ can no longer be located.
When you ‘lose’ your virginity it just ceases to exist as a part of the human condition. The first act of coition or sex, at which people say that they have 'lost' their virginity, generally means that in the case of the human female, the hymen, a membrane surrounding the vaginal opening, is torn or enlarged by the act of sexual penetration. Whilst the hymen is indicative of virginity, this is not always so. For further explanation, look it up yourself. As for us males, the first act of sex generally means you now know what it feels like and would like to do it again as soon as possible, please. In neither case is anything ‘lost’. If anything, you have gained a kind of kinaesthetic knowledge. Any loss is purely that of a metaphysical state of prior being. Almost a paradigm shift of thinking occurs, usually headed by the thought ‘So that was what all the fuss is about’. Nothing physical really drops off (Unless your Mum has told you all kinds of horror stories.). It definitely does not mean that your ‘virginity’ is left lying around in the street for any Tom, Dick or Harriet to pick up and recycle. Virginities do not get dumped in a landfill or transported to a gigantic ‘Lost Virginity’ warehouses where rack upon rack of discarded virginities are stored, awaiting claim by their erstwhile owners.
Taking all the above on board, I feel that ‘lose’ is the wrong term to use. If you lose something you tend to want it back, and very few people of my acquaintance have ever voiced such a desire about their virginity. It’s just one of those things. You can’t ‘lose’ your childhood, your mind, or your virginity. You might have had a crappy childhood and your first sex might have been pretty naff and unsatisfying; your ‘mind’ is in your head and the only way to lose that is to get killed. To ‘lose’ any of those seems no more than a literary conceit.
I’m confused. Is that weird enough for everyone?
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