Today my soul is quiet enough to read Hemmingway and feel the heat in my skin, and the tight dryness of thirst at the back of my throat. For me the fog and damp does not exist. Even with a house full of in laws and teenagers winding my dog up past breaking point.
Squaring my particular circle was not difficult. I simply went out and did something I cannot ordinarily do whilst in uniform.
Let me fill you in on a little background; there are two ‘Big Issue’ sellers that work either side of the High Street. Same guys, week in, week out, trying to drag themselves out of the gutter by their own efforts. One is a reformed addict and the other a guy who got dumped by his wife and family when he went bust. There but for the grace of God go we all.
In the past, both of these two ‘Big issue’ sellers have helped some my workmates out, speaking up for them, or simply by just giving a kind word when the rest of the world was all shit, fan, incoming.
What did I do? Simply walked up to both of them in turn, pressed a few quid into their hand and bid them ‘Merry Christmas’ before walking away. I know it’s not much, but it raised a friendly smile and that made me feel good about this whole festive season malarkey. More so than anything else.
What I did won’t make much difference to their lives I’m sure, but payback has been earned and even a small gesture is better than none at all. Lives have been turned by less. All we can do sometimes is pass on a little hope.
Merry Christmas all.