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Saturday, March 25, 2006


And you are…..?

Warning. Rant factor 6. Cue special effects and heavy duty corset on leading man.

There are certain people who really make me want to punch their lights out. The busy bodies who can’t bear to see someone nicked for parking wrongly. They interfere and then have a go at you for being an enforcing officer. I’m sure it has something Freudian to do with authority figures.

Take today. I’m working my way down a line of parked cars in a limited waiting zone, making sure everyone is not getting greedy and taking more time than they should. As is usual, one flags up as ‘Over time’ and I do a double check in my note book against previous observations. Okay, chummy is a good half hour over and due to get spanked. I begin the booking process when a youngish woman shoves her face in front of me. “What are you doing?” I didn’t say she was clever or pretty now did I?
“Excuse me?” I respond. I’m a uniformed Parking Enforcer stupid, and I’m booking this vehicle. Goes the internal response. Keeping my teeth clamped firmly together I carry on punching in details.
“You can’t book that car.” She responds, as if she is someone who can pull rank over me. Not even the fucking Mayor can tell me to stop me doing my job, bozo.
“I’ll go and get the driver, stop what you’re doing.”
“No.” I reply, wondering who this person thinks she is.
“I’m their Social Worker, and there’s no need to be rude.” She answers my unspoken question. My spirits sink. A real live go-gettem-floyd holy rolling social worker on a crusade for her ‘client’. Oh my God!

Sure enough, she gets the driver to the vehicle within sixty seconds (Before I can finish booking) and he drives away. She flounces off, obviously feeling very self righteous (I kid you not – she must have had lessons in how to flounce – she did it very well). Me, I just shrugged and carried on, secure in the knowledge that the driver would get caught next time. Maybe not by me, but he will be caught when his personal state-paid-for guardian angel isn’t around to keep him out of trouble.

We get them all in the end. Irony, don’t you just love it? Rather like jokes of this nature.


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Location: British Columbia, Canada

Exasperated expatriate expostulations all the way from British Columbia, Canada. As if anyone really cared. Oh, I also watch Icelandic Volcanoes and seismic activity. Don't ask me why.

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