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Sunday, July 17, 2005


Lost property

Car park duty today on the outdoor parks. Not a bad little job despite the heat. I was busy heading back to base for lunch when a member of the public accosted me about a suspect package.

Grimacing a little, I followed his directions and saw a sports bag sitting next to a footpath. No one within ten feet of it. Wandered over, having first shut down my radio and took a look. One sports bag, zipped shut. Okay, now what? Walked off ten metres, switched my radio back on and called CCTV.
“Hallo 515, what’s the problem?”
“Unattended sports bag, blue, no one seems to know who’s it is.”
“Out of my camera range I’m afraid 515. Will get a couple of units out to take a look at it for you. Can you hang about until they get there and tell them where it is?”
“Roger that.”

We aren’t allowed to go rootling around at every bit of lost property we see, just in case it does do something it’s not supposed to, like go bang.

Our channel went very quiet for twenty minutes. All the while, I’m looking at this sports bag wondering what if it was a bomb? Do these things give off smoke before they go off? Do I get enough time to duck or is it ‘goodnight nurse’ without a bye, leave or thank you? What about those two families less than twenty feet from it? Would I get a chance to shout a warning?

At length my old mate PC49 rolls up with oppo in tow. PC49 sends his mate over to have a look at the bag while we watch. Bag was gingerly unzipped and a cursory look at the immediate contents made. “Fifteenth bloody one today.” Grumbles PC49.
“Keeping you busy?” I asked.
“Not a good time to shout ‘bang!’ then?”
He gave me a very old fashioned look. “No.” I can take a hint.

It turned out to be someone’s unwashed sports kit, which was duly taken to lost property whilst I returned to the mess room where I received a few supportive comments like;
“Why didn’t you give it a kick, you’ve got steel toecaps?”
My colleagues are such a wonderful bunch, not.

One thing that made me wonder though, had it really been a terrorist bomb, apart from myself, the only other people close enough to get hurt were a couple of Muslim families. You can’t tell me that’s right. Not in any holy book.

Oh well, back on car parks tomorrow.


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Location: British Columbia, Canada

Exasperated expatriate expostulations all the way from British Columbia, Canada. As if anyone really cared. Oh, I also watch Icelandic Volcanoes and seismic activity. Don't ask me why.

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